8/6/2004 - Another Funds Transfer

I must be pretty lucky. I just got another email from someone in Africa who wants to give me millions of dollars. This one's pretty good, though.

I received it from Dennis Thompson, Esq, who is a "solicitor at law" in South Africa. His client, Charles Rosen, died leaving $9 million in the bank, and the government is going to take it because Charlie has no kin. The deal is that Chas and I share a last name, and if I declare myself to be Charlie's kin, Denny T, Esquire, will fill out all the paperwork to make it look all legal, and he'll split some of the bucks with yours truly.

Pretty tasty deal, I must say. However, I'm a little wary. That is, I was wary until I read the following line: "I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of law".

I have a guarantee! What is the risk when I have a guarantee? I have a guarantee from a man I have never met. A guarantee from a man who is requesting that I become a party to fraud. Iron clad!

My oh my... how to reply? I started to write a reply, which began "What a coincidence! Some guy named 'Thompson' just died over here in the States! Give me your bank account number, and I'll transfer his cash right over."

However, I'm thinking that that may not be cocky enough. Maybe "Pinky swear?" or "Uncle Charlie's dead?!?!?! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! I just talked to him last week!!!!!" or how about "Enlarge your pen!s naturally!" Heh. I like that last one. Spammed ya back!