4/13/2005 - Spam

Why does replying to spam subsequently generate more spam? I don't get it.

Scenario: I received an email from Michael Young, requesting that I assist him in transferring millions of dollars around because some Miguel Rosen died in a car accident in Nigeria or something like that. I don't recall his original message, because I literally receieve at least one a day, and most often I delete them. However, I had replied to his message, saying something like "What a coincidence! This is the 37th relative of mine that died in a Nigerian car crash this week. Don't you have any traffic laws over there?"

Michael replied to me this morning, saying that he genuinely is honest, and he really wants to use this money to open an orphanage. Nice touch - how could I deny orphans?

I hate to deny orphans anything. They're so... orphanly. Say the word... "orphan". Or. Phan. Look at how it's spelled - o-r-p-h-a-n. It breaks me up inside just hearing the word.

In my quest to love all the orphan children, I decided that the best thing to do is help. So I forwarded another request to transfer money from another person directly to Michael, along with this note:

Michael,

I don't doubt your honor, which is why I am forwarding the attached email, so you may assist this other gentleman.

Please don't ask me to assist you. I know I'm missing out on millions of dollars.

Keep reaching for the stars.

Is this the last we'll hear of Michael Young? Probably not.