12/1/2004 - Spell It Out For Me

This time of year is a time for introspection. I'm realizing that I am extremely literal, and I take everything at face value. This applies to my life currently in that I do not think that a woman is interested in me romantically until she actually says, "I am interested in you romantically." Other signals that my brain accepts as signs of interest from a woman:

• "Would you like to come home with me and have sex?"


• "I want to have sex with you."


• "Will you have sex with me?"


• "Well, you might as well come in my bedroom. We're going to be having sex later anyway."


• "When are you going to have sex with me?"


• "I don't want to marry you, Jay. I just want to f*** you."


• Me: "Why are you upset?"; Her: "Because we went out and you didn't f*** me!"

All of these are real scenarios from my past. In retrospect, I don't think that these are good starts for a romantic relationship. Perhaps a more compatible relationship should grow from a friendship, a mutual respect, and a steady progression of caring and intimacy.

Why didn't anyone tell me this? Oh, that's right, everyone was telling me this my whole life.