11/27/2004 - Lather Rinse Repeat

The title has nothing to do with this post, aside from the fact that I'm going to make an observation that a million people before me have probably made.

I'm listening to Christmas songs already. My observation is that the lyrics to some songs are pretty... disturbing.

First example is a song that I remember from my youth as such an upbeat, pleasant, happy tune - "We Need A Little Christmas". Listening closer, it has the lines:

I've grown a little leaner
Grown a little colder
Grown a little sadder
Grown a little older
And I need a little angel
Sitting on my shoulder
We need a little Christmas now

This sounds like substance abuse, doesn't it? I feel dirty.

Second example: Baby, It's Cold Outside. Listen to the words yourself, since I'm too embarrassed to duplicate them here. The jist of it is that the dude in the song won't let the girl leave. If this song were admitted as evidence in a sexual harassment suit, it would be a pretty clear case for the woman. No means no, dude.

In light of this trend, I intend to write my own Christmas song. I welcome any suggestions. Should it be about war? Famine? Pestilance? Mountains of credit card debt!

Oh, I ain't got very much money
And my car is sounding funny
But as long as banks tell me so
I will owe, I will owe, I will owe!